No Words.

I don't even know where to start. The past months? Weeks? How bout days. I will summerize though that these past couple of months have been quite the ride. Many--many--tears, laughter, joy, pain, light and darkness, and so much more! I have grown more than I even realize right now. I, in a way, felt as though I was in the growning pain years of childhood again. Excited that every week another half inch taller, but at the same time, my body aches. This past week...discription: bipolar. Spiritual attacks all around me, constantly. Tuesday was the lowest of this past week containing past troubles and present trials. I broke just a little. I let Satan get a hold of that tiny hole, and he expanded it rapidly! I felt my flesh begin to take over with its desires. As I talk with those around me, we realize that it isn't just a few people randomly struggling or getting attacked, the war is getting more intense as the days go on. I see all around me oppression. But that is not all. I see Hope! I see this white satain fabric come from the sky, and gracefully fall upon the campus, embracing all that is near it. It doesn't just stop there though! The white, pure grace falls upon and covers the city, then continues to move towards surrounding areas, the river taking it with power down the US. As the week went on, my brothers and sisters encouraged me and spoke truth to me. And I thank them for that! :) With questions I had racing through my head, I went to the Bible to try and find the answers. With this I was lead to other verses. The main couple verses that I, in a way, had an epiphany with were 2 Corinthians 12:7-10. I have read countless times verses 9-10 but this time I decided to read before that. "Therefore, in order to keep me from becoming conceited, I was given a thorn in my flesh, a messanger of Satan, to torment me. Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness". Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong." The part that got me was that Paul was given a thron in his flesh, Paul pleaded for God to take it from him, but instead God replies with "My grace is sufficient for you..."! This hit me in an entirely new light! All we need in our trials and pain is God's grace. It is enough! I also realized, if God gets glory when I am weak, if His power is made perfect in my weakness, then bring on the weakness. For when I am weak, then I am strong! Not only all of this, but for the past month if not more, I have been trying to figure out where God wants me and what He wants to do with me. What has God gifted me with? How do I use those gifts to the full potential God has for them? I think things are just starting to be revealed and I am unbelievably excited! Though, I find myself at times being impatient and wanting to know now. But I trust that God will reveal what He wants, when He wants, and it will be perfect! **God, use me to the potential you have for me! Clean me out! And fill me a new! I want nothing of me and all of You!**